Oh dear oh dear oh fucking dear

A couple of months ago, in comments, I mentioned that while I was really looking forward to the upcoming Prometheus, I had some reservations:

“Yeah, I’m stoked too – killer cast, killer director and production crew. Could be something really special indeed.

But……

I confess to a couple of niggling worries:

First, is it just me, or does all the buzz about Massive Archetypal Themes, the Very Origins of the Human Race etc etc…. seem a bit overblown?

I mean, the original Alien was so humanly small-scale and scruffy – a tired, grumpy, half-assed freighter crew get tossed into a maelstrom of corporate betrayal and environmental hazard. All they want is to get home in one piece and get paid. Then all they want is to get home in one piece. Then all they want is not to die. Powerful thematic narrative ensues, embedded in these very mundane concerns.

I worry that Prometheus, in shooting for Massively Meaningful, is going to run the risk of coming off bombastic.

Secondly (and related, I think), is it just me, or does explaining the derelict, the space jockey and the eggs rob them of a lot of their power?

I know, I know we all want to know – but therein lies the power of the original movie; it’s an unrequited desire. We never do find out what that shit was all about, and that’s what makes it sublimely creepy and mysterious. Maybe the space jockey was the last remnant of just another grumpy half-assed freighter crew just trying to get home and get paid – a million years ago. Or a thousand, who knows? Maybe his kind are gone, maybe they’re not; maybe we’ll meet them round the next corner. Maybe the eggs were a random hazardous cargo, maybe an infestation, or okay, yeah, maybe a weapon and the space jockey some kind of biological warfare bomber pilot. Or maybe the xenomorphs and eggs are some part of the space jockey race’s own lifecycle that somehow got out of hand. It’s all maybes, and that’s what lends it power: We Will Never Know. The universe is ancient and infinite and strange – feel its cold breath on the nape of your neck.

By offering an explanation, by actually solving the mystery, you undercut the chill of Not Knowing – AND you run the risk of your explanation being nowhere near as cool or scary as the audience’s own various speculations on the subject. So your explanation needs to be Pretty Fucking Chilling and Cool, if it’s going to deliver over and above those risks it runs. I worry that it won’t be, that in fact it’ll be trite and Scy Fy channel dumbed down.

Truly hope I’m wrong, on both counts.”

So, now I’m thinking about changing my name to Cassandra

It’s as if Damon Lindelof got hold of a time machine a couple of years ago, zipped ahead to April 2012, and then went back and said “Hey, there’s this mid-list SF author called Morgan who’s got a bunch of misgivings about this movie. I know, let’s write a screenplay based entirely on those misgivings.

Or maybe it’s just that hiring the writer responsible for Lost to update what was the darkest, nastiest, most powerful SF movie franchise ever devised is a bit like setting out to re-make Sergio Leone’s Dollar Trilogy with the cast of the Muppet Show.  Feasible in theory, but why the fuck would you do it?

Now, I hasten to add that haven’t actually seen Prometheus yet myself.  And I suppose that Mr Rothwell there could (for reasons I confess I’m rather hard-pressed to imagine) be lying his arse off about the movie.  But you know what – he’d be far from the only one (though certainly the most hilarious so far).  No, I think, all things considered, this one is going to take the same priority place as the rather poor and wholly unnecessary The Thing prequel – i.e. rent it at Global Video some time when I’ve got nothing better to do and  can’t find anything more promising to watch.

Oh, well – it all saves on baby sitting, I guess…..

Sigh.